Poop-casso

Mommy went to the chiropractor, leaving Daddy alone to look after the Demon Child. No problem, Daddy thought, I’ll just put her down and maybe go up a few levels in World of Warcraft.

She went down peacefully enough. She didn’t even need a bottle. Very cuddly in her blanket, on top of the old comforter she uses to snuggle in, with some stuffed animals to keep her company. Ah, peace!

Twenty minuter later, I hear a cry. Then a shriek. Then a continuing series of shrieks. I should probably have panicked, but I get this a lot and it’s usually a false alarm. But not this time. As I opened the door, I was hit full force by the stench of baby-shit gone bad! Poor Sophie had para-trooped out of her crib, which is fairly high up, and was sitting on the floor, covered in crap. It was in her hair, on her arms and legs, on her hands, and she was quickly spreading the brown love around the room.

I saw her diaper had been thrown off, presumably just in time for the big event. It was completely clean. The bed itself was NASTY. Poop smeared everywhere. We got one of those cute white cribs with little nibs up and down the bars. Those little crevices had tons of funky stuff in there. And lo and behold, the biggest chip in the dookie cookie had been thrown between the crib and the wall, and lay “nestled” between the crib, the carpet, and the baseboard.

I had about 45 minutes of solo cleaning until Mommy got home. She found the whole situation hysterical at first, but it was probably another hour before life was back to normal. Sophie played in her pack-n-play the whole time, and avoided further smelly surprises.